501) Are you checking me out, or are you just reading my shirt?

502)  Hey baby, what do you say we go behind that rock and get a little boulder?!?

503)  I must expel some seminal fluid. May I use your body?

504)  I’d love to swap bodily fluids with you.

505) Everytime you look at me, you make my world better.

506)  The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to screw you on the floor.

507)  I’d like to get between your legs and eat my way straight to your heart…

508) Is there as much of a chance of you going out with me as there is that an elf will jump out of my desk and spit cider in my ear? ‘Cause if there is, I like those odds.

509)  If I told you I had a 2 inch dick would you let me do you? (if she says no) say Good, because mine is 8 inches.

510)  Hello. I have sex on the first date. Do you?

511)  I would bang you so hard, you’d learn from it.

512) Wanna run your tongue over my razor stubble?

513)  Do you like my belt buckle? (any response is okay ) It would look better against your forehead!

514)  Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under…

515)  Pardon me, but are you a screamer or a moaner?

516) You smell like Fritos. That’s why I got this hungry stare.

517)  I’m a freelance gynocologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?

518)  Hey baby, how would you like to see the soles of your feet in my car wing mirrors?

519) Do you believe in love at seventh sight? Because I saw you, but I had to look at you six more times to make sure you weren’t a mirage.

520) If my love for you were an ocean, we’d all be drowning, baby.

521)  Would you like gin and platonic, or do you prefer scotch and sofa?

522) There are many mistakes in life, but you sure as hell aren’t one of them.

523)  Say, didn’t we go to different schools together?

524)  You look the spitting image of a hooker I know!

525)  Miss, if you have already lost your virginity, can I have the package it came in?

526) I don’t know about you, but I always thought Neitzsche was sexy. Wanna stare into my abyss sometime?

527)  Hey baby, you look like you could suck the chrome of a car bumper!

528)  I have had quite a bit to drink and you are beginning to look pretty good!

529) I don’t believe in love at first sight, so I’m just gonna take another few looks.

530)  Didn’t anyone tell you that you wanted to sleep with me? I thought you knew!

531)  “Of all the parties I have been to, this is the most recent!”

532) Where are you from, and more importantly, where do you wanna wake up tomorrow?

533)  Excuse me, but you have a beep on your nose. What? (Reach up and gently squeeze her nose) BEEP!

534)  What’s that on your face? Oh, must just be beauty.

535) Nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

536)  Are you busy tonight at 3:00 A.M.?

537) Shhh! You don’t want to wake up anyone in Heaven, they might realize you snuck out.

538)  The next item up for bid is in my pants.

539)  Come back to my place so I can give you a lovely parting gift.

540) Can I have directions to your heart?

541) How’d you like a years supply of Turtle Wax.

542) Don’t worry–I’ve been neutered.

543) Do you like bacon? You do? Wanna strip?

544) So, Is it safe to say I’m gonna score?

545) Happy hour’s over but it’s still going strong at my place.

546) If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?

547) Excuse me, do you think you might possibly have a mutual friend who could introduce us.

548) I earn more than you can spend.

549) Hi, are you here to meet a nice man or will I do?

550) I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?

551) I’m sorry, were you talking to me?Her: No. Well then, please start.

552) I’m selling myself on eBay. how much do you think I should ask for?

553)  I’m the kind of man who deserves to have women I don’t deserve.

554) If you were my mother, my father would be the luckiest man on earth.

555) Um, you’ve got something in your eye. Oh, nevermind, it’s just a sparkle.

556) Sorry to bother you, but I had to find out what kind of woman would go out dressed like that.

557)  Take a screw with you and put it in your pocket. Then, when a girl comes up to you, offer her the screw and say, “Wanna screw?”

558) You make me want to wake up every day just so I can see your gorgeous face.

559)  Wait until the end of the evening when everything is real hazy and alcohol soaked, walk up to someone you’ve never met and say, “Come on, we’re leaving.” (The key is to act like you know them.)

560)  What’s a nice girl like you doing talking to a loser like me?

561) Hey so you want to see some magic? You and I will go to your place have sex and I’ll disappear in the morning.

562)  So, I see you eat with utensils. Well, I’ve got one that I’m just dying to put in your drawers.

563) I think, er, heaven hurt you and — no, wait. Um, do you believe in walking by love at first sight? No that’s not it, uh, I have Windex in my…no. Oh, what the hell — YOU’RE PRETTY!

564)  You look a little feverish. luckily I always have an oral thermometer on me.

565)  Excuse me, your fly is down. Oops, maybe not now but definately later.

566)  Wow! Are you really as beautiful as you seem or do you remind me of myself?

567) May I be the next jealous boyfriend to slash your tires?

568)  I’m so lonely I’d do anyone. Buy you a drink?.

569)  Hey, wanna see my R2D2 impersonation? (Think about it…)

570) Know what I like best about you baby? You haven’t maced me yet.

571) Today’s Give To The Poor Day, so will you give me your number?

572)  Oooh, you’re lookin’ fine. Not in the good way, in the “you’ll do” way.

573) I’m either going home with you or behind you, take your pick.

574) They say a girl’s supposed to marry someone like her father. Do you mind if I call you Daddy?

575) I really want to know more about you… starting with why you have that stupid look on your face.

576) If we’re quiet, my roommate’ll never know we’re bumping uglies.

577) Can I put my beef in your taco?.

578) You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me!

579)

580) You look a little pale — how about some mouth-to-mouth?

581) You’ve stolen my heart, but that’s ok cause I have 3 more at home in my freezer

582) Thats a nice smile. It’d look better if it was all you were wearing!

583) I know I’m not a grocery item but I can tell when your checking me out.

584) If your name isn’t Chris, Eric, or Mike, you might have a chance with me!

585) Either my eyes need checking or you’re the best looking guy I’ve seen all week.

586) Is your dad a peanut maker? ‘Cause you’ve got nice nuts!

587) Did you just grab my ass? No? Well you can if you want too!.

588) What would you REALLY do for a Klondike Bar?

589) If you’re going to regret this in the morning, we can always sleep until the afternoon.

590) You’ve been a bad boy. Go to my room!

591) Hi, I’m a easy slut looking for a good time.

592) Hey! I’m redecorating my room, and I think you’d look wonderful in my bed.

593) Do I get points for loyalty?

594) I warn you, I’ll bring it back if I’m not completely satisfied.

595) So, what should we name our kids?

596) Can I taste it first, to make sure I like it?

597) Can I see your extended warranty?

598) I may not be Jay-Z, but I still know how to Rock-A-Fella.

599) Would it be possible to leave a small deposit?

600)  I’m sure I don’t need to emphasize the importance of a regular breast exam…